Every day as parents we question whether or not we are good, average hell … great parents, especially with the internet’s telling us that we are doing it all wrong, or those overzealous parenting posts on Facebook, or our own psychosis screaming into our brains that we are not good enough parents.
Well, my friends, I am here to tell you that you’re a great parent, no matter what those annoying helicopter moms or dads say. How do I know that? Well, I got some mad skills, I’ve been around the parenting block for a decade, I’ve made many mistakes – my oldest sons first year of life was like a circus, I had no idea what I was doing, I made everyone around me crazy, and my pediatrician actually red-flagged my file.
That is not a joke.
My sons file was really red-flagged ala Elaine Benes in Seinfeld – because I was a nut job.
So I am pretty qualified to let you know that you are not fucking up as a parent, that you are doing more than an OK job at this parenting thing, I know that because you…
- Wash the same pair of socks over 6,000 times in one week because your child can only wear those socks, no matter how many new pairs of the exact same pair of socks you bought, they don’t want the new ones.
- Cut their fingernails in their sleeps because it the only way to get it done and more importantly avoid a temper tantrum.
- Make the same lunch for twelve years because it’s the only lunch food your child will eat.
- Volunteer… as a coach, with the PTA, Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, Religion Teacher, School Function, whatever volunteer gig you take, you’re giving up valuable time for your child. Kudos to you!
- Have boogers, tears, food stains on your shirt.
- Sing them to sleep even though you have a headache, the flu, or are hung-over.
- Held their hand when they went off to school for the first time.
- Stayed up to the wee hours of the night for moral support as they finish their school reports.
- Worked extra hours (basically handled your shit) so you can watch them play any sport, perform in any production, or watch them march in any fricking parade.
- Cried yourself to sleep because they were rejected in any way by a friend, a school admission, the travel soccer team or any rejection really – could be the random kid at the park who didn’t want to play with them – am I being dramatic? HELL YEA!
- Gave in for the 100th time to the play date, sleepover; ice-cream or gum at the checkout line. Sucker MC? Absolutely! But hey they’re worth it.
- Paid $15.00 for some crap toy at the amusement park cause your parents never did that. Okay, that’s dumb but it happens.
- Refrained from clothes-lining the mom whose snotty kid tormented your child at recess.
… You love them like no other and will take a gosh darn bullet for them even if it means you may spill your wine.