Ruby oh Ruby! Have you ever watched this show? I finally got to see my first episode last night and I am hooked. What a fabulous woman with a amazing journey. Ruby said something that really struck me last night, she said (and it’s not verbatim) basically when we emotionally eat it’s because we are not feeling the emotion just trying to fill the hole. A light bulb went off for me and struck home. I explored this further and realized I do eat for every emotion. Take the “happy emotion” – I eat when “good” things happen to “reward” myself and I don’t actually let that feeling of happiness flood me. So sad, right? If I don’t do it for the happy emotion you can bet, sure as shit I am not doing it for any other emotion. It’s a scary concept but I am going to try my hardest to feel every emotion – sit in my own shit – if you will. If I ever want to conquer the battle of the bulge, I need to dig deeper. Let’s get out those shovels…and dig!!
Why is it that whenever you have a sleeping infant it’s like a covert CIA mission to get them into the house for a proper nap? Now, mind you – I am far from a nap nazi, but if I have the chance for the littlest bugger to take a proper nap in his crib, I am all for it. Today, Matty fell asleep in the car after running a few errands, and boy was I smiling. The trick now was getting him in the house, into his crib without waking him up. I drove an extra loop around the neighborhood to lock in his sleep….you get it right? When I arrived home I gave Richie orders to keep his lips locked…”zip it, lock it and put it in your pocket”, hopped out of the car, grabbed Matty very delicately, threw him on my shoulder, bounced up the steps, took the keys out of my boobies (gotta put them somewhere easily accessible) and was just about to put them in the lock and guess what? I dropped the mother f’ing keys. Now, in 89 degree humid heat, sweat beads dripping down my face I needed to act like a Russian gymnast and had to practically do a back bend to pick them up – all without disturbing the infant, or dropping him. It was hard but I did it – and without fail… I successfully put him in the crib, opened a window and turned on the sound machine…ahh mission accomplished!
Here they are..the Little Buggers, cute eh? Matthew is 22 months and Richie is 5 ½. I love them to death, they are my light and my life and occasionally drive me to down a few beers, throw back a few funnels… but only occasionally.